It's been an interesting ride. It seems to be slow, but it's like a new me is emerging. For 30 out of 40 adult years I've been known by others (silently) as the 'big guy'. Now I'm shrinking - I can look into the mirror and not be disgusted with myself. I'm wearing clothes that for 20 years have been my 'skinny clothes.' People are coming up and complimenting me, saying that I look good. I'm able to exercise more vigorously than I have for a long time. It's all kind of strange, and it's going to take a while for me to get used to 'the new me'.
Yesterday, Sue commented that I was "happier". Well, I suppose it's true, but I hadn't really realized it.
Today was a little interesting - it was communion at church, so I take the little cracker piece and without thinking, popped it in my mouth and started chewing. Then it dawns on me -'ooops, I'm not supposed to be chewing, so I had to spit it out into a Kleenex. Thankfully we don't believe in transubstantiation ;-)
I also left my bottle of water in the car, so instead of slowly sipping my first litre of water while leisurely sitting in church, I had to pound down 2 liters in 5 hours. Note to self, if you choose to do this and you go out to do some errands, be very aware of where the washrooms are - fun times.
Sunday, May 31, 2015
Friday, May 29, 2015
Exercise
It has been difficult for me to get moving. I enjoy walking and cycling with Sue - that seems fun to me. I find I don't really enjoy the gym. Basically it seems I don't like to exercise alone. The program is very clear - I need to get in aerobic level exercise almost every day. It has been hard for me to accept this - I'd really like to fool myself into thinking I can do this without, but I know I can't keep fooling myself any more.
I've set a goal to do 30 minutes of brisk to vigorous activity 6 out of 7 days each week. Now I've got to figure out some ways to do this nights when I'm by myself.
Tonight I was alone. I decided I would bike as soon as I got home from work. Thirty minutes later, I had finished a refreshing ride.
Success - yay!
I've set a goal to do 30 minutes of brisk to vigorous activity 6 out of 7 days each week. Now I've got to figure out some ways to do this nights when I'm by myself.
Tonight I was alone. I decided I would bike as soon as I got home from work. Thirty minutes later, I had finished a refreshing ride.
Success - yay!
Thursday, May 28, 2015
Week Two
Health check and official weigh-in today. Apparently my blood sugars and triglycerides are only slightly above normal already. Wow. Encouraging. Total official weight loss over past 2 weeks = 10 lbs 5 oz, also good.
Group session was about how to set goals that support weight loss - focusing on healthy habits rather than numbers. Lots to think about.
Fewer symptoms of ketosis this week - occasional bad breath and minor headache. Very tolerable. The worst thing is feeling like you have to pee most of the time - all the time. I've finally got a system that lets me mostly sleep through the night without trips to the potty - shake 1, then 1.0 L water before 'lunch', shake 2, then 1.0 L before 'supper', then no extra water. Seems to work, but it puts a lot of pressure on the bladder during the day ;-) Apparently the extra water is to prevent wrinkles and stretch marks.
I've had a few cravings, like when we were walking in the mall today and the smell of Kernels popcorn was heavy in the air, but they don't last long.
In many ways, the shakes and water only plan is very reassuring - no need to worry about weighing/ measuring food, or making good choices, etc. Somehow chocolate or vanilla is much simpler. Somehow it's easier to analyze your feelings about food when your distant from it.
It was a little stressful this week when the pound-a-day loss slowed to 1/2 lb. per day. I start worrying that I'll plateau right away, like I usually do. Time to remember to focus on healthy habits and try not to think as much about numbers.
A number of people from different areas of life mentioned they notice my weight loss - very motivating to stay strict. I don't hate seeing myself in a mirror quite as much.
Lots of motivation, hopefully it will keep me motivated to get in my daily exercise this week...
Group session was about how to set goals that support weight loss - focusing on healthy habits rather than numbers. Lots to think about.
Fewer symptoms of ketosis this week - occasional bad breath and minor headache. Very tolerable. The worst thing is feeling like you have to pee most of the time - all the time. I've finally got a system that lets me mostly sleep through the night without trips to the potty - shake 1, then 1.0 L water before 'lunch', shake 2, then 1.0 L before 'supper', then no extra water. Seems to work, but it puts a lot of pressure on the bladder during the day ;-) Apparently the extra water is to prevent wrinkles and stretch marks.
I've had a few cravings, like when we were walking in the mall today and the smell of Kernels popcorn was heavy in the air, but they don't last long.
In many ways, the shakes and water only plan is very reassuring - no need to worry about weighing/ measuring food, or making good choices, etc. Somehow chocolate or vanilla is much simpler. Somehow it's easier to analyze your feelings about food when your distant from it.
It was a little stressful this week when the pound-a-day loss slowed to 1/2 lb. per day. I start worrying that I'll plateau right away, like I usually do. Time to remember to focus on healthy habits and try not to think as much about numbers.
A number of people from different areas of life mentioned they notice my weight loss - very motivating to stay strict. I don't hate seeing myself in a mirror quite as much.
Lots of motivation, hopefully it will keep me motivated to get in my daily exercise this week...
Sunday, May 24, 2015
About Relearning
Today it felt very odd, and uncomfortable, to whiz right by Tim Horton's on my way home after conducting chapels at the jail in Napanee. I always stop to pick up a Timmies and 2 timbits on my way back - the coffee soothes my raspy throat, and timbits - well that's just a treat.
I was thinking a bit about my relative success on the Optifast plan thus far, as I'm driving 'sans Timmie'. One of the main reasons for the meal replacement plan is about 'Stimuli Narrowing'. It's kind of like resetting the brain, so all of those subconscious food-related habits can be reversed. It makes it a little easier as I'm sailing by Tim's to think on the benefits of this 'Stimuli Narrowing' You can read more about it here 'Stimuli Narrowing'
One of the challenges they gave us at week 1 group session was to encourage us to keep an open mind. I'm trying to do that, and adhering strictly to the 'just Optifast + 2 extra liters of water + some daily exercise, and I'm wondering what my food life will be like once I finish the Optifast plan. One of the self-study questions for this week is the questions: "Is there anything that you wouldn't be willing to change to your 'best weight'?"
Suddenly I'm thinking things like, "Wow, would I be willing to completely avoid ice cream, if I need to do that?" "Am I willing to exercise more than 30 minutes a day, if that's what it takes?" "Am I willing to avoid potato chips?" I don't know what will be needed to keep my weight down to my 'best weight' yet, but these are heavy questions to think on.
There is a certain kind of security that comes from having a strictly prescribed 'eating regime', but there certainly is a lot of uncertainty and trepidation that comes from not knowing what my future eating and exercise will be like.
I was thinking a bit about my relative success on the Optifast plan thus far, as I'm driving 'sans Timmie'. One of the main reasons for the meal replacement plan is about 'Stimuli Narrowing'. It's kind of like resetting the brain, so all of those subconscious food-related habits can be reversed. It makes it a little easier as I'm sailing by Tim's to think on the benefits of this 'Stimuli Narrowing' You can read more about it here 'Stimuli Narrowing'
One of the challenges they gave us at week 1 group session was to encourage us to keep an open mind. I'm trying to do that, and adhering strictly to the 'just Optifast + 2 extra liters of water + some daily exercise, and I'm wondering what my food life will be like once I finish the Optifast plan. One of the self-study questions for this week is the questions: "Is there anything that you wouldn't be willing to change to your 'best weight'?"
Suddenly I'm thinking things like, "Wow, would I be willing to completely avoid ice cream, if I need to do that?" "Am I willing to exercise more than 30 minutes a day, if that's what it takes?" "Am I willing to avoid potato chips?" I don't know what will be needed to keep my weight down to my 'best weight' yet, but these are heavy questions to think on.
There is a certain kind of security that comes from having a strictly prescribed 'eating regime', but there certainly is a lot of uncertainty and trepidation that comes from not knowing what my future eating and exercise will be like.
Thursday, May 21, 2015
Week One
Well, it's been a wild ride this week. Only 11 weeks of Optifast only to go! Seems like an eternity now, but I'm sure I'll blink a couple of times and we'll be done.
Certainly had some significant weight loss this week - 8 lbs by my scale first thing in the morning, and 5 lbs by the clinic scale - either way it's all good. This morning I got dressed for work and my pants were puckering at the waistline, so quickly went 'shopping' in my 'thin clothes' closet and found some pants that looked good. A month ago my size 44 pants were just a little loose and size 42 pants were out of the question. Today, all my 44's are on a shelf to be altered once I'm down to maintenance weight. I'm wearing size 42 and I can squeak into a couple pairs of size 40 pants. Very exciting.
I stopped by Value Village after group session, looking for a new, smaller, belt - no luck today. I figure I'll be spending quite a few shopping sessions at VV over the coming months. Once I get down to a stable weight, then I'll go shopping for real.
The weekly group sessions have been informative. This week we talked about 'ideal weight', 'wish weight', and 'best weight.' The concept being that it is not so realistic to try and squeeze ourselves into what might be a medically perfect weight, that would unfortunately require so little calories and so much daily exercise that we wouldn't likely stick to it for very long - then give up and gain most of it back again.
At this point I don't have a firm weight loss goal. They keep saying that most participants lose 10 to 20 percent of their starting body weight. I'm hoping that if I stick to the program 100% that I'll end up closer to the 20% mark. That would put me 160 - 170.
I'm not having a lot of problems staying away from food. The meal replacements, Metamucil, and extra drinking water leave me quite full most of the time. Sometimes it is even a bit hard to drink the next shake at the 4 hour mark because I'm so full. It has required a bit of daily planning though - I have to have my shake powder, shaker container, and cold water - which is fine if I'm at home or work, but a little tricky if I'm travelling or like the other day doing staff training off-site.
Drinking enough water is difficult, and requires careful monitoring. Today, for example, I was crazy busy at work and by 11:30 am I had only drank 500 ml instead of the requisite 1.0 L, so I quickly guzzled 500 ml plus my lunchtime shake. Youwzers - driving down Johnson Street in Kingston, I wasn't quite sure I'd make it to the parking lot and get to the hospital washrooms in time :-) Note to self - pace out the water, Steve.
Certainly had some significant weight loss this week - 8 lbs by my scale first thing in the morning, and 5 lbs by the clinic scale - either way it's all good. This morning I got dressed for work and my pants were puckering at the waistline, so quickly went 'shopping' in my 'thin clothes' closet and found some pants that looked good. A month ago my size 44 pants were just a little loose and size 42 pants were out of the question. Today, all my 44's are on a shelf to be altered once I'm down to maintenance weight. I'm wearing size 42 and I can squeak into a couple pairs of size 40 pants. Very exciting.
I stopped by Value Village after group session, looking for a new, smaller, belt - no luck today. I figure I'll be spending quite a few shopping sessions at VV over the coming months. Once I get down to a stable weight, then I'll go shopping for real.
The weekly group sessions have been informative. This week we talked about 'ideal weight', 'wish weight', and 'best weight.' The concept being that it is not so realistic to try and squeeze ourselves into what might be a medically perfect weight, that would unfortunately require so little calories and so much daily exercise that we wouldn't likely stick to it for very long - then give up and gain most of it back again.
At this point I don't have a firm weight loss goal. They keep saying that most participants lose 10 to 20 percent of their starting body weight. I'm hoping that if I stick to the program 100% that I'll end up closer to the 20% mark. That would put me 160 - 170.
I'm not having a lot of problems staying away from food. The meal replacements, Metamucil, and extra drinking water leave me quite full most of the time. Sometimes it is even a bit hard to drink the next shake at the 4 hour mark because I'm so full. It has required a bit of daily planning though - I have to have my shake powder, shaker container, and cold water - which is fine if I'm at home or work, but a little tricky if I'm travelling or like the other day doing staff training off-site.
Drinking enough water is difficult, and requires careful monitoring. Today, for example, I was crazy busy at work and by 11:30 am I had only drank 500 ml instead of the requisite 1.0 L, so I quickly guzzled 500 ml plus my lunchtime shake. Youwzers - driving down Johnson Street in Kingston, I wasn't quite sure I'd make it to the parking lot and get to the hospital washrooms in time :-) Note to self - pace out the water, Steve.
Monday, May 18, 2015
Day Four
Well it's 4 days into the program, and all is well.
So far I have rarely felt any hunger. I have a few cravings for food. It is hard opening up the fridge or cupboard and seeing some of my favourite foods. So far I've been able to shut the door and get away without cheating.
We had a bunch of friends over the other night - Sue asked what I thought about the idea and I said 'go'. I have decided that I need to keep life rolling along all 'normal' like. It was pretty hard having all my favourite snacks floating around, but I sipped on a shake through the whole evening. It was actually kind of empowering to realize that I didn't have to partake.
I haven't been noticing many side effects. A little bit of low grade headache from time to time; a little buzz - like a little too much coffee - on occasion; the odd hunger pang or food craving. Oh, and lots of peeing - every time I turn around. I have noticed that I don't have the physical stamina or endurance when it comes to hard physical exertion. I suppose it's due to the seriously reduced calorie intake, and why they warn you not to engage in strenuous exercise. I guess I should take the advise.
Seems like I've got close to the right dosage of Metamucil - so that's good.
The scale has been showing weights that I haven't seen in nearly 30 years. I'm guessing that the rapid weight loss won't sustain throughout the full 3 months, but I'll take it while I can.
So far I have rarely felt any hunger. I have a few cravings for food. It is hard opening up the fridge or cupboard and seeing some of my favourite foods. So far I've been able to shut the door and get away without cheating.
We had a bunch of friends over the other night - Sue asked what I thought about the idea and I said 'go'. I have decided that I need to keep life rolling along all 'normal' like. It was pretty hard having all my favourite snacks floating around, but I sipped on a shake through the whole evening. It was actually kind of empowering to realize that I didn't have to partake.
I haven't been noticing many side effects. A little bit of low grade headache from time to time; a little buzz - like a little too much coffee - on occasion; the odd hunger pang or food craving. Oh, and lots of peeing - every time I turn around. I have noticed that I don't have the physical stamina or endurance when it comes to hard physical exertion. I suppose it's due to the seriously reduced calorie intake, and why they warn you not to engage in strenuous exercise. I guess I should take the advise.
Seems like I've got close to the right dosage of Metamucil - so that's good.
The scale has been showing weights that I haven't seen in nearly 30 years. I'm guessing that the rapid weight loss won't sustain throughout the full 3 months, but I'll take it while I can.
Friday, May 15, 2015
Day One
So day one is nearly under my belt. Whew! It has been very different, but it has gone pretty well. Very few hunger pangs, in fact I felt very full most of the day. Crazy, eh!
It was very, very different to not have breakfast at home (like I usually do). I decided to drink my first shake at work, at my desk. I usually sip a coffee for the first hour at my desk, and I'm not supposed to have coffee, so substitute cold shake instead. Not quite as satisfying, but Ok. After that was done, it was 4 Metamucil capsules with 1 cup of water. Then working through 1 liter of water through the morning.
Lunch time was radically different - vanilla flavor instead of chocolate. They actually taste pretty good. Only thing is, they leave a little after taste, so it was good that I brought a toothbrush to work. Another 4 capsules of Metamucil and another 1 liter of water throughout the afternoon.
Same for suppertime - minus the extra water. It was a little different sipping on a shake and watching another person eat real food, but I was able to manage it quite well - no lasting psychological trauma to speak of... I think I'm going to hold off on any additional water for the rest of the day. It was quite interesting having a full bladder most of the day (ya think!), and I'd really like to be able to sleep through the night without waking up every few minutes to go to the WC.
It's nearly 8pm. Sue's at work. I've kept busy - visiting with Val, then going through my closet of 'fat' clothes and finding a few that will finally fit me again, then some computer time. Then I'll go and play some guitar.
Shake # 4 is scheduled for 10 pm.
I appreciate the prayers of my friends and family. It has helped.
The only symptoms I've had are those of mild ketosis getting started: a bit of dry mouth, a little bad breath, and a teensy, tiny headache. I've been a little unfocused at work, but lots of energy.
Tomorrow, we'll get a better idea if the dose of Metamucil was correct <big sigh>
It was very, very different to not have breakfast at home (like I usually do). I decided to drink my first shake at work, at my desk. I usually sip a coffee for the first hour at my desk, and I'm not supposed to have coffee, so substitute cold shake instead. Not quite as satisfying, but Ok. After that was done, it was 4 Metamucil capsules with 1 cup of water. Then working through 1 liter of water through the morning.
Lunch time was radically different - vanilla flavor instead of chocolate. They actually taste pretty good. Only thing is, they leave a little after taste, so it was good that I brought a toothbrush to work. Another 4 capsules of Metamucil and another 1 liter of water throughout the afternoon.
Same for suppertime - minus the extra water. It was a little different sipping on a shake and watching another person eat real food, but I was able to manage it quite well - no lasting psychological trauma to speak of... I think I'm going to hold off on any additional water for the rest of the day. It was quite interesting having a full bladder most of the day (ya think!), and I'd really like to be able to sleep through the night without waking up every few minutes to go to the WC.
It's nearly 8pm. Sue's at work. I've kept busy - visiting with Val, then going through my closet of 'fat' clothes and finding a few that will finally fit me again, then some computer time. Then I'll go and play some guitar.
Shake # 4 is scheduled for 10 pm.
I appreciate the prayers of my friends and family. It has helped.
The only symptoms I've had are those of mild ketosis getting started: a bit of dry mouth, a little bad breath, and a teensy, tiny headache. I've been a little unfocused at work, but lots of energy.
Tomorrow, we'll get a better idea if the dose of Metamucil was correct <big sigh>
Thursday, May 14, 2015
Optifast Begins Tomorrow.
The purpose of this blog is to track my weight loss progress, milestones, challenges, and feelings in regards to the Optifast phase of my personal weight loss journey. Some friends may choose to follow along out of curiosity or out of desire to support and encourage me. Whatever your reason for dropping by, I hope you'll find something of interest.
Today was my second group session, and my official weigh-in/ medical consultation. Good news - the hospital scale is the same as our home scale - yaaay! Picked up a week's supply of Optifast. Group session was on the topic, "Why traditional diets don't work."
I look forward to tomorrow with quite a bit of anxiety - can I do it? Well, no, I've decided that I WILL do it 100% with no cheating. The concern is more about the mechanics of how I'll manage things like family gatherings and parties and restaurants out. After having tried many weight loss programs, I've realized that my body doesn't like to loose weight, so I'm afraid that I'll go on this and maybe loose only a few pounds rather than the 40 pounds that I would like to loose. I'm afraid that I'll lose the weight but then gain it back again, like other times.
I am cautiously optimistic. This seems like a program based on a lot of science and it is carefully medically supervised. Since it's funded by government dollars, they have a vested interest in seeing people loose weight and keep it off - there is a 2 1/2 year support and follow-up period
I know there is a group of friends and family praying for me. I appreciate your understanding, your prayers, and your encouragement.
I won't post every day, but I will post regularly about my progress - good and bad.
Stay tuned.
Today was my second group session, and my official weigh-in/ medical consultation. Good news - the hospital scale is the same as our home scale - yaaay! Picked up a week's supply of Optifast. Group session was on the topic, "Why traditional diets don't work."
I look forward to tomorrow with quite a bit of anxiety - can I do it? Well, no, I've decided that I WILL do it 100% with no cheating. The concern is more about the mechanics of how I'll manage things like family gatherings and parties and restaurants out. After having tried many weight loss programs, I've realized that my body doesn't like to loose weight, so I'm afraid that I'll go on this and maybe loose only a few pounds rather than the 40 pounds that I would like to loose. I'm afraid that I'll lose the weight but then gain it back again, like other times.
I am cautiously optimistic. This seems like a program based on a lot of science and it is carefully medically supervised. Since it's funded by government dollars, they have a vested interest in seeing people loose weight and keep it off - there is a 2 1/2 year support and follow-up period
I know there is a group of friends and family praying for me. I appreciate your understanding, your prayers, and your encouragement.
I won't post every day, but I will post regularly about my progress - good and bad.
Stay tuned.
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